To all you parents who have dropped your kids off at college for the first time: breathe. It’s going to be OK. I promise. I know it doesn’t feel like it right now. I know your stomach is doing backflips, and your brain won’t shut up about all the terrible things that might happen. But take it from me—a seasoned veteran whose kid went to college almost five years ago—it’s going to work out.

Back then, I didn’t believe it either. I was a wreck. I wish I’d had some “This Is Going to Be OK” wine to get me through it (seriously, why has no one marketed that yet?). Dropping off my kid at the dorms felt like I was ripping my heart out and handing it to a stranger in an RA vest. I didn’t know what to do with myself.

Let me guess: you’re running through all the “what ifs” in your head, right?

   •   What if they hate their roommate?

   •   What if they survive on nothing but granola bars and coffee?

   •   What if they forget to go to class?

   •   What if they go downtown and join a riot? (Why does my brain always go here??)

   •   What if they get drunk?

   •   What if they call me crying and I can’t fix it?

I’ve been there. I asked all those questions and more. And I can tell you now: your kid will figure it out. (OK, except maybe the laundry thing. If you’re lucky, they’ll learn the hard way that towels can grow mold. If not, well… there’s always spring semester.)

Here’s what I learned: college is a process. For your kid and for you. Sure, they might be homesick at first, or eat pizza rolls for three meals straight, or panic about their first midterm. But they’ll find their people, get into a groove, and adjust. And you? You’ll adjust too. Eventually.

For me, the hardest part wasn’t the drop-off—it was the silence afterward. I missed our daily texts, the random questions about laundry or student loans, and just knowing how my kid was doing every single day. At night, my brain would spiral:

   •   “Is he eating actual food?”

   •   “What if he’s lonely?”

   •   “What if he flunks his classes?”

   •   “What if his roommate is a serial killer?!”

Honestly, I could’ve driven myself to the brink worrying about him. But here’s the thing: I learned to trust the process. (Annoying advice, I know. But it’s true.) It took time, but eventually, I stopped texting him every five minutes to see if he was alive. I realized that he was finding his independence—and that was the whole point of sending him to college in the first place.

Now, here I am, years later, watching him get ready to graduate this spring. And let me tell you, it’s wild. I look back on that freshman year me—the one sobbing in the car on the way home from the dorms—and I wish I could give him a hug. I wish I could tell him, “You’re doing great. You are fine fine fine and you are going to be fine. YOU are going to be fine.”

So, to all of you sitting in the thick of it right now, let me say it again: It’s going to be OK. This is hard, yes. It’s emotional and overwhelming and downright terrifying. But you’ve done the hard work to get your kid here, and you’re successfully launching them into the next phase of life. Gold stars for you!

And as weird and empty as your house might feel right now, know this: your kid will grow, and so will you. Someday, you’ll watch them cross the stage at graduation, and you’ll be hit with the kind of pride that makes every late-night worry worth it.

So for now, take a deep breath. Say it with me:

“It’s going to be OK.”

And maybe pour yourself a glass of that wine. You’ve earned it. ❤️

How’s that? Does it strike the right balance of reflection, humor, and support?